Friday, April 24, 2009

Meeting God in a Dark Alley

This was originally posted a year ago, when Lindsey and I were both involved in NCFCA competitive speech. Even though our circumstances have changed (we no longer compete!) we think the message still very much applies. Hope it blesses you!

“When you are weak, you are strong!” My eyes starting fuzzing out as Charity grabbed my hands and squeezed them. When you are weak, you are strong. The words reverberated in my head as I walked past the judges, smiling at the blurring shape of their faces in my eyes. What did it mean exactly? I was certainly weak. My legs felt bendy like licorice and I couldn’t remember what month it was, let alone formulate a winning impromptu speech. I should’ve worn my glasses, because my eyes were fuzzing in and out. How was it possible for me to be strong at the moment?

It doesn't take a legal adult to experience troubles. I'm seventeen, and I have seen just enough to understand that life isn't always berries and cream. Although the example of my impromptu round is admittedly insignificant compared to other struggles, its a small slice of the kind of obstacles that humble us every day and convince us of our own insufficiency.

I wonder, why does God sometimes lead us through moments where we feel overcome by weakness? As we watch other Christians skip blithely through fields of daisies, facing a life with little or no obstacles, we can feel that God has dumped us in a dark alley. As small as it seems compared to the troubles of others, why does He put me in an impromptu room with blurry vision? It feels so pointless.

Let The Real Sufferers Stand Up

My weakness is insignificant when considered alongside the problems others face. For instance, my friend Stephanie is directing a documentary on the life and ministry of Nick Vujicic. Born without limbs, Nick struggles to complete tasks most of us can finish in an instant. And guess what? His situation will not change in his lifetime. He can't look forward to one day finding a cure to his problems. On the surface, he has no reason for hope.

Elisabeth was also bombarded by weakness. Restrained from marrying the man she loved as he sought direction from God for over a year, she wondered at the indescribable ache in her heart. In her diary she copied down a prayer of Amy Carmichael's, struggling to find perseverance in her journey:

"'If I make much of anything appointed, magnify it secretly to myself or insidiously to others; if I let them think it 'hard,' if I look back longingly upon what used to be, and linger among the byways of memory, so that my power to help is weakened, then I know nothing of Calvary love.'"

Then Elisabeth prayed herself, "Dear Lord, Thou alone knowest the inmost workings of my mind and heart. Keep the level of my love in Christ--never lower. Thou hast said, 'Neither are my ways your ways.' Help me to walk in Thine, Lord, in peace." (Elisabeth Elliot, Passion and Purity.)

Some say that because Christ carried our sorrows, we will have no more suffering on earth. Any pain we experience on earth is unexplainable in their theology. But what about Nick’s struggles? How can we ignore the cries of Elisabeth in her time of loneliness and waiting? How can we explain Paul’s vision problems and the unnamed ‘thorn in the side’ that he experienced throughout the course of his life? How can we say that Christ took our sufferings when these Christians have suffered so?

Christ’s death didn’t remove human weakness from the Christian life. Rather, God allows the weakness of His children to be revealed for a purpose. While my impromptu anxiety wasn’t real suffering, it was a wake up call to cry out to the Creator of the Universe for strength. It was a humbling revelation of inadequacy. It was a situation that pulled me from my high horse and caused me to fall on Christ for grace to get through.

And that's exactly the point. The situations when our inadequacy is exposed are meant to lead to further trust: “Therefore, those also who suffer according to the will of God shall entrust their souls to a faithful Creator in doing what is right.” (1 Peter 4:19)

He Is Our ________

Hope. Strength. Joy. Fill the above blank with any of these words and they’ll fit. God doesn't promise us perfect bliss on earth, but He does give us something better. In the face of struggles--whether it's believing God will help in weaving through a traffic jam or entrusting to Him delicate matters of the heart--rest can be found in His unfailing love.

King David said something funny in Psalm 63. After crying out that his life was like a “dry and weary land where there is no water,” he wrote that he'd continue praising God because “because Your lovingkindness is better than life." That's pretty unusual. While David didn't mince words describing his situation, he had found a higher source of joy than just his circumstances. Interestingly enough, the people I have met who are closest to God are the ones who have met Him in the dark alleys of life; because they learned that His lovingkindness, even in darkness, was better than living in daisy covered fields without His Presence.

And yet, those who travel through dark alleys aren't left there forever. Sufferers in the big and the small have a promise: "And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself restore you and make you strong..." (1 Peter 5:10) Will we ever be made strong? Will we be healed? Maybe not tomorrow or the next day, but one day, it's certain we will. And our Healer will be the God who does all things well.

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