Tuesday, April 27, 2010
"There's a place in the sun that she's never been
Where life is fair and time is a friend...
She looks out the window and wonders again..."I'm going to cut it for you straight. This is a dumb song. It's about a mother wanting to leave her children, and I have some obvious issues with that. And, I'm kicking myself for even starting a post with a country song in the title.
(Oh where is my dignity?)But I had an epiphany while listening to this song and the story of a woman who "lives for tomorrow," dreaming of the future. It hit me how often I hear people talking about not being obsessed with the future, not worrying, etc.
The topic of "The Future" is a dead horse I beat all the time when chatting with friends: "Don't get worked up over this [homework, guy, job, otherproblem]; it'll all work out in the end. Just chill. Keep your mind in the now..." is the advice we give each other. Nobody wants to be that woman from the song. You'd be better off just stamping the words "doomed" and "desperate" on your forehead.
Yet while we talk about not obsessing over the future, we don't really make a gameplan for how to live out our talk. (At least, I really haven't.) So what's the plan? How do we actually "live for the now" and stop going crazy worrying about tomorrow?
Here's a quick diagram:
1. Don't Stop Your Obsession. Just Change it. My gut says (sadly, from past experience) that yes, we need to stop obsessing over life, but we need to replace that obsession with something else. We need to obsess over God, instead of our situations. If we don't shift over to Him, we're going to jump right back into anxiety. The key to not being that lady from the song is to become obsessed about something better, that something being God. (Wow, am I really taking the song that far? Hmm. Yes. I am.)
2. Supplement Point 1 with Friends. Okay, but still there's the "how." How do we obsess over God?
While I'm not a pro on this topic, Imma gonna say it: you need more than the Bible. Now, the Bible is vital. You won't come to know Jesus without it. You won't grow without it. We should probably read it more than we do, because it's the source of every good hope. Just the same, God designed us to need more than His Word.
He's made us to want not only the companionship of His Spirit, but also the companionship of friends.* Through them His grace is also dispensed. I'm just beginning to realize how much of the positive changes in my life were influenced, partially, by the friends close to me.
Mhmm. I just sounded like a cheeseball, didn't I? Seriously though, just ask yourself: would you laugh at the same kind of jokes you do now, if you hadn't grown up around your family members or your good friends? Would you have the same standards you do now if you were, instead, born into another family? What if your family was the same, but if you had a different hometown? Our companions affect us, and we affect our companions. They become part of us.
The obvious challenge for us here is that, as friends, we need to point each other to God-obsession. We have different personalities. Don't fight with them; use them. Those differences can help us see ourselves, decisions, and situations in a totally new way. Letting good, wise friends nudge us toward wisdom helps us to grow. If we want to stop worrying about the future, we need to surround ourselves with God-obsessed friends who are dedicated to doing that, too.
None of us are independent enough to live totally without friends. (When was the last time you booked a vacation on a desert island?) We were created to do life with other people.
Maybe if that woman in the song had some friends around to give her shoulders a good shake, she would've thought twice about "living for tomorrow." Maybe they could've warned her that too much dreaming about the future can make us lose the present. And who knows? I might even be her myself, except for my friends.
That might be a stretch though, because it was a country song, and bad things were bound to happen anyway.
*I define "friend" as any person who knows you to some degree, and is a part of your life. That means family members can be friends too.
So, what are your suggestions for becoming more obsessed with Jesus? Tell me about your friends, too. How do they encourage you? Have you made friends with your family members? Do you ever overthink country music?
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